In honor of Earth Day, I present these eco-jokes.

1. What is Mother Nature’s favorite food? RECYCLED GARBAGE.

2. What did the endangered species say to the Exxon executive who was telling jokes? STOP, YOU’RE KILLING ME.

3. Why did the chicken cross the road? TO ESCAPE THE HORRIBLE CONDITIONS AT THE TYSON FOODS PROCESSING PLANT.

4. What did Global Warming say to James Inhofe? “IT’S TRULY INSANE THAT YOU DON’T BELIEVE IN ME.”

5. What’s the difference between the fossil-fuel industry and an unstoppable plague of flesh-eating bacteria? NOT MUCH, REALLY, WHEN YOU CONSIDER THE LONG-TERM IMPACT OF BOTH.