Time for another Friday Face-Offs! HOLD ON TO YOUR FACE OR IT MIGHT FALL OFF

This week’s Friday Face-Off is “You Belong With Me” by Cannibal Corpse Taylor Swift. Watch the original here:

Decent song. I picked it over Myley Csirus’s (sp) “Party in the USA,” which I find banal (save for that “zweet zwoot” sound in the chorus).

YEAH, I SAID IT: I FIND “PARTY IN THE USA” BANAL. She writes a whole song about that one time she was in a car and heard Jay-Z on the radio??? Like she’s Proust and “99 Problems” is a madeleine? C’mon, I hear Jay-Z all the time — you don’t hear me writing a song about it. (Can’t even tell if this rant makes sense, but screw it; I’m really down on “Party in the USA.”)

Besides, Taylor Swift and Milee Crysysz both get crushed by my girl Kelly Clarkson. Goddamn, why haven’t I done a “Since U Been Gone” FFO? That would be a scorched-earth internet phenom.

ANYHOO … let’s get this started! Friday Face-Offs! First contestant is up next!