Here’s all you need to know about video games: The video game industry is worth more money than the movie industry. On any given night, there are more video games than television shows in major US households. These two statistics combine to form a phenomenon known as “video-game excellence is here to stay with us.”

Video games have come a long way in this year (of 2020), and not a moment too soon. As Americans turned to video games, video games were eager to turn Americans on: Many buttons were pressed, many controllers were used, many game systems were purchased as we laser-blasted our way through the latest digital romper room known as new video games to enjoy.

Here are the TOP TEN VIDEO GAMES OF 2020:

10. Clicking games

9. Shooting games

8. Puzzle games, you are now free to puzzle to your mind

7. Animal games

6. Viral games that are social

5. Jump and smash the car, yell “Hooray for me!”

4. First-person games where the star of the game is YOU

3. Quiet games of reflection

2. Colorful, snazzy video games

1. Video games are here to stay

There has never been a more complex entity than the human mind, and 2020 was no different. We used our minds for many things during this extraordinary year, and one such thing we used our minds for was to get blown away by facts. Our thoughts reflect the reality we perceive, and since our thoughts exist in our minds, when the reality we perceive includes a mind-blowing fact (that we heard about in an article or through conversation with friends), then that means our thoughts cause our mind to be blown. Hence the phrase “mind-blowing facts.”

2020 will be remembered for many things, but first among them will be the abundance of mind-blowing facts. Some of these facts announced themselves with much fanfare, while others snuck into our consciousness over the course of time. Regardless of how they made themselves known, these facts contributed to a mind-blowing year we all loved.

Here are the TOP TEN MIND-BLOWING FACTS OF 2020:

10. Decent mind-blowing facts that make your brain warm

9. Astonishing mind-blowing facts

8. Mind-blowing facts that are sure to blow your mind

7. Why can’t I turn off my mind? These facts

6. (TIE) The trendiest mind-blowing facts / Mind-blowing statistics

5. When you read something in a magazine article that make you feel a little bit crazy — yes, that’s the good life! (Of mind-blowing facts)

4. Astronauts are people too

3. Fresh vegetables are grown from a mere substance known as dirt, a.k.a. manure (turds)

2. “When you look in the mirror … what does your reflection see?”

1. A zipper that unzips your mind like a pair of pants

Social media, the defining phenomenon of our time, has given rise to a new breed of celebrities. Known as “influencers,” their names may be unfamiliar to you, but ask your kids: They will have heard of them.

Often found on YouTube, TikTok, and even Facebook, these influencers are taking hold of their own personal brands and using them to engage, inspire, and reach out to a new generation of audiences who are just as cyber-savvy as they are themselves. It’s a feedback loop of good vibes — a community of content that breaks down barriers while keeping it real. And as far as “influence” goes, these online stars can wear a sweater or dress that instantly becomes a must-have item for their fans. They can also support important causes or charities with a single tweet or “signal boost,” alerting their followers to new activities. The hottest shoes are also quite popular in the world of influencers.

Of course, influencers have been impacted by the events of 2020 just like everyone else. Some of them rose to the moment, while others fell by the wayside during the sad occasion of 2020. But one thing is for sure: The influencers can do many things.

So as the year draws to a close, let’s look back at some of the influencers who served up drama, laughter, and even more in 2020. Here are the TOP TEN INFLUENCERS OF 2020:

10. Instagram models

9. YouTube comedians

8. Facebook moms with interesting ideas

7. Dirty boys with filthy minds

6. DJs and record producers who kept the party going

5. Many rappers are influencers who we like

4. Could a popular animal be an influencer? We’ll know more in 2021 but let’s celebrate 2020 for now

3. (TIE) 2020 influencers who are glamorous / 2020 influencers who make us chortle and snortle(sp?)

2. Influencers who succeeded in changing our behavior

1. Persuasive influencers

When the real world is just too much, sometimes it feels good to dip into the fantasy world of celebrity gossip. Gossip is an ancient human impulse; it’s as old as a roaring campfire around which our caveman ancestors would gather to talk about things like, “Glub-Glub is eating too many dinosaur tails, he looks fat” or “They say Bog-Flab and Kruk-Mub were kissing under the caveman mistletoe after yesterday’s hunt at Christmastime.” What I mean to convey with this example is that gossip is a very human impulse: A way to bond with our community about behavior we may not agree with, but can all agree is fun to talk about.

The unique thing about celebrity gossip is that celebrities capture the public imagination, and so their gossip is very exciting to all who know of it. Have you ever seen a celebrity magazine at the grocery store checkout line? You may have noticed a headline that took you by surprise: “I never suspected SHE would go out with HIM, she’s a big celebrity and he’s only a C-list celebrity!” That’s the power of celebrity gossip. And if you don’t believe that celebrity gossip could still be relevant in a year like 2020, just go online — you’ll find hundreds of web sites devoted to celebrity gossip, and if a celebrity is on Instagram people will talk (gossip) about them in the comments section of their Instagram account. It’s all a part of the “celebrity gossip lifestyle.”

So get ready for some juicy reading! Keep this on the hush-hush, and tell the paparazzi to look the other way, because here are the TOP TEN CELEBRITY GOSSIP STORIES OF 2020:

10. Huge actors getting in trouble

9. Bad behavior at the highest levels

8. Engagement rings for beloved celebrities … could wedding bells be far behind?

7. “They starred in a movie together … now they star in MAKING LOVE together.”

6. (TIE) Actresses yelling at people who bring them coffee / The famous man was taking a walk

5. Industry gossip about showbiz contracts

4. So-and-so from TV eats diarrhea and voted for Trump

3. Drug and alcohol problems … the dark side of being a celebrity (“getting high in showbiz city”)

2. Hollywood dirt and secrets

1. Movies

2020 was, it must be said, an extraordinary year for food. Food has been a constant source of nutrition and inspiration in our human story, but this year was quite different, and food was also impacted by these differences. As many Americans found themselves not going to restaurants as much in 2020, their “food focus” shifted to their own kitchens, and cooking became the “main course” when it came to the grand meal of making food.

Keep in mind that when we think of food in 2020, we must also think of take-out and delivery services, because these were also factors. As well as: grocery shopping. In short, this was a year in which we were forced to adapt to changing circumstances … and our food adapted with us.

2020 was a year unlike any other. But food remained beside us (and inside us!) all the while, providing comfort and sustenance as we struggled through this year while also enjoying ourselves during pleasant moments.

So let’s enjoy a final feast! Pull up a chair and join me in celebrating the best of 2020 when it comes to food by gorging on this supper of THE TOP TEN FOODS OF 2020:

10. Refreshing foods

9. Gotta make more fucking food

8. Buy food, eat food, go to sleep, wake up, take a piss, eat food, roll over, die

7. (TIE) Fine gourmet meals prepared at home / Candy bars

6. Supporting your favorite local restaurants by buying their foods

5. Surprising foods

4. Foods that make you laugh or smile

3. Foreign foods

2. Midnight snacks because why not

1. Perfection: A single bay leaf on a piece of fish, seasoned “just so”

If there’s one thing we saw a lot of in 2020, it was controversy. “Controversy” is defined as “arguments” or “fights,” but really it’s something much more serious: It’s a schism between what one person believes to be right and what his or her neighbor believes to be correct, but they disagree about those things, and therefore they have what is “a controversy.”

From politics to religion, from culture to science, controversy rose to new heights in 2020. It pitted brother against brother, friend against man, and the lonely truth-teller against the roaring crowd of a brainwashed populace. Of course, controversies are as old as society itself. As Julius Caesar once proclaimed: “Friends, Roman, countrymen … lend me your ears. Controversy must be defeated or our Republic will fall. Heed my words throughout the Roman Empire.” Will America be strong enough, bold enough, to rebuild after such a year of controversies as we witnessed in 2020? Only time will tell. For now, let us take stock of the controversies that defined this extraordinary year.

Here are the TOP TEN CONTROVERSIES OF 2020:

10. Passionate arguments

9. “I was just making a joke!”

8. Could anything be bigger than these controversies?

7. “Go to hell or I’ll spit in your face!” (Said in a controversial tone)

6. Election controversies

5. Sports controversies, instant reply is required!

4. To err is human … err upon deez nuts (controversies 2020)

3.  Differing notions of what is or isn’t appropriate as we analyze high-stakes controversies

2. Who knows what is best, and how do we know if that’s the case?

1. 2 + 2 = 5.9

As a wise man once said: “2020 … a year to remember.” As this year draws to a close, we must all agree it was one for the history books. We saw wonderful triumphs as well as unfortunate tragedies, and sometimes it felt like a struggle just to keep up. Let’s not mince words: In many ways 2020 was a challenging year. 

Now that the year is drawing to a close, some people wrestled with the question: How could anyone summarize this extraordinary year? Could it be done? How could someone make sense of the last twelve months — the highs and lows, the historical moments, the catastrophes and celebrations that marked 2020 as a year not soon to be forgotten?

Fortunately, no matter how chaotic our times may be, when it comes to looking back on the year, we have the concept of “lists” to help us make sense of what has happened. There are many year-end lists online — the trend has only grown in recent years — but there is only one person who can make the very best year-end lists, and that person is me. And I have yet to see a year that will not bow down and be humbled by my lists. It’s true: even 2020, one of the worst recent years, must ultimately succumb to the power of my lists, the most powerful force on earth, and say “Thank you for summarizing me with these lists, master, for in the end I am but another year of time.”

So let us celebrate the best of 2020 with an annual tradition unlike any other, the one tradition that must surely stand the test of time: It’s a wonderful tradition, and it’s the tradition known simply as “My Lists.”

Our first cause for celebration via my lists is TELEVISION. And surely there’s never been a better reason! For, as Americans found themselves spending more time at home in 2020, they turned to television to comfort and entertain them. And television — thank goodness — was more than happy to step up. From psychological dramas to premium cable comedies, 2020 will be remembered for many things, but one of them will be that it was the year America had a passionate love affair with the best of TV and TV truly became part of the family.

Here are the TOP TEN TELEVISION SHOWS OF 2020:

10. Shows that make you barf

9. Pretty good television shows

8. Well-crafted television shows

7. Television shows of a high caliber with multiple factors of enjoyment

6. Shows with extremely strong characters and writing

5. More than one television show can be seen

4. Streaming quality

3. Television shows that are almost as fun as real life

2. Fast-paced television shows

1. Exquisite stuff! This is television at its finest!