What I like about this one is that, judging from the Christmas tree, and how blindingly shiny the headstock of that Epiphone is, we are witnessing the ol’ “first song played on the new Christmas guitar” ritual, like she tore off the wrapping paper and was like, “Oh hell yeah, the electric guitar I asked for! Mom and Dad you’re the best — now set up the video camera I’m about to SET IT OFF like a one-woman Shaggs guitar-tone cover band except I’m gonna sing that Taylor Swift song everyone likes!”
LOL, for what is Taylor Swift, if not an upper-middle-class one-woman Shaggs, y’know?
“Taylor, I’m a let you finish, but ‘My Pal Foot Foot’ is one of the best videos of all time!”
ALSO: From the user’s video description: Christmas 2009 – on to the next level
The only thing badder-asseder than wearing an old grungy gas mask while you play your drum kit … is wearing a shiny, spotless, I’m-not-trying-to-buy-army-surplus, brand-new gas mask while you play your electronic drum kit. Almost makes me wonder if the mask and the drums are sold as a set … maybe in the “Chemical Ali Memorial Corner” at Guitar Center?
The drums sound so killer at the beginning of the song! “Gas mask keepin’ it in the pocket.”
Also, dig the honorary 3rd member of this band, a creature drawn to 5-string basses like a moth to flame (0:49).
FRIDAY FACE OFFS! “WHAT YOU’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR HAS BEEN HERE THE WHOLE TIME”
Time for another Friday Face-Offs! HOLD ON TO YOUR FACE OR IT MIGHT FALL OFF
This week’s Friday Face-Off is “You Belong With Me” by Cannibal Corpse Taylor Swift. Watch the original here:
Decent song. I picked it over Myley Csirus’s (sp) “Party in the USA,” which I find banal (save for that “zweet zwoot” sound in the chorus).
YEAH, I SAID IT: I FIND “PARTY IN THE USA” BANAL. She writes a whole song about that one time she was in a car and heard Jay-Z on the radio??? Like she’s Proust and “99 Problems” is a madeleine? C’mon, I hear Jay-Z all the time — you don’t hear me writing a song about it. (Can’t even tell if this rant makes sense, but screw it; I’m really down on “Party in the USA.”)
Besides, Taylor Swift and Milee Crysysz both get crushed by my girl Kelly Clarkson. Goddamn, why haven’t I done a “Since U Been Gone” FFO? That would be a scorched-earth internet phenom.
ANYHOO … let’s get this started! Friday Face-Offs! First contestant is up next!
Not sure how to talk about this video. I think it’s a product of deep and abiding love. Just watch it. Watch him. Love him. Worry about him. (Video has an elegiac air that makes me nervous/sad.) Wish you knew him. Wonder how you can be more like him. Strategize about how to take the spirit of 0:05 and 0:11 and incorporate it into your life (without necessarily incorporating 0:28, maybe)…
Because goddamn, people, this guy looks incandescent. Check out 1:19 are you out of your mind with how AWESOME that looks? How are some folks able to make motions like that and they just break your heart with how gorgeous it is? Are you seriously telling me you’re not inventing a time machine to figure out how to go back in time so you can be at these parties with this guy? What about the scene when he’s at the beach???
ARRRGGGH FRIDAY FACE-OFFS!!! WE’RE BACK IN BUSINESS, PEOPLE
Okay, basically this video isn’t a true 2nd place video … but there’s one element of this video that is pure champ. material … so it gets the bump to 2nd place … and that one amazing element is — well, let’s see if you can figure it out … pay attention to 3:24, 3:40, 3:58 (which is about when the cameraman wakes the fuck up and realizes where the real story lies) and (for a brief glorious flash) at 5:58 … and then maybe you wanna check out 6:37 …
Woo-hoo, so good! Are teenagers cooler than they used to be? That guy looks like he’s having fun in a way I don’t even think we had back when I was a teenager. He’s chillin’ soooo hard with his bass. He probably doesn’t even know he’s playing in front of the whole school at the big assembly … he’s like, “Another day, another chance to play my bass and groove to the music. It’s all good. Someday I’m gonna be a professional bass player and make a lot of money and travel all over the world. What time is it? It’s time to move my finger from this fret to that fret … here we go … hell yeah, I freakin’ nailed it. Ladies and gentlemen, I enjoy playing the bass.”
A guy like that has long coattails, y’know? This video just rode on some serious emo bass-player coattails. And I dare Republicans to try to obstruct this dude … he will crush Mitch McConnell like a bug.
Okay, we’re nearing the end of this week’s Friday Face-Offs! WINNING VIDEO IS NEXT
By the way, I just realized: This is the 20th Friday Face-Offs! Can you believe it? Twenty great face-offs in the history books … and yet it’s still the greatest thing to happen to the internet since sliced bread.
This performance is hypnotic. I think ol’ Jandek Jr. here is on to something. Also? It’s visually beautiful. It has a muted palette, like all webcam videos, but somehow the colors are perfect. How did that happen? Same with the composition: Big white head balanced by big dreadnought body.
This is what all modern art should look like.
Every so often you stumble on one of these home-made youtube videos where everything falls into place, and you’re like, “This works. This is so completely its own thing, so elegant … who cares if it’s accidental? You could put this up against anything by Bill Viola and it’d hold its own.”
Sigh. See, this takes me back. For us, it was a cassette of the Cult’s “Electric” album. Remember cranking “Aphrodisiac Jacket”* and trying to rip the head rest off the passenger seat because it sounded so jamming in a lime-green Ford Escort??? Yeah. WE BRUNG IT. That’s some 1990 memories right there for all you whippersnappers …
Anyway, glad these dudes are keeping the flame alive … the flame of intra-automobile group headbanging, one of the greatest dance forms ever, when will Joan Acocella write about it?
*(aka “World’s Biggest Rip-Off of ‘White Room’ Ever Recorded How Did Rick Rubin Not Get The Pants Sued Off Him?”)
The power chord heard ’round the world. It makes me LOL every time.
No shame in your game, fellas. I’M FEELING YOU. GUITARS RULE
Louder louder
always louder
musical keys are for punks
a chord is a chord is a chord
just crank it up
and have fun
I love how in the comments to this video, people are like, “Dude you’re in the wrong key — you’re totally playing in the wrong key, it sounds weird,” and the guitarist is like, “Yeah, I thought it sounded weird, I think it was the guitar; the tuners didn’t work. So I bought a new guitar.”
DUDE. I LOVE YOU BUT IT’S NOT THE GUITAR. TRUST ME.
“What are ya gonna do.”
That’s the poignancy and acoustic chaos you’ve come to expect from FRIDAY FACE-OFFS!!!